


one penny heart breaker

by clxude



Series: fifty cent glow stick au [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Developing Relationship, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Happy Ending, M/M, Non-Linear Narrative, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Trans Character, communication is key, glowstick au, none of the sadness comes from transphobia fyi, trans ennoshita
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-16
Updated: 2016-11-16
Packaged: 2018-08-31 10:47:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,058
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8575387
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clxude/pseuds/clxude
Summary: They met at the first volleyball practice of their first year at Karasuno.He turned around, saw a fellow first year with a shaved head and rolled up sleeves on his gym uniform and a glowing neck, and knew that volleyball in high school was the right choice, after all.





	

**Author's Note:**

> ennotana - the newest addition to the fifty cent glowstick universe  
> betad by sarcasticspacenerd!!!

When he started high school, Chikara wasn’t sure if he wanted to keep playing volleyball. He liked it and the general atmosphere around playing and practicing with his teammates, but he was in high school now - club activities that he was anything less than spectacular at weren’t going to help his transcript.

 

Three months into second year, he’s still not sure if he actually wants to play. He loves being around Kinoshita and Narita, but he could do that just as easily outside of practice. Most of the things that he likes about volleyball could happen if he wasn’t playing, in all honestly.

 

And then there’s Tanaka Ryuunosuke, because Chikara’s life could never be easy, could it?

 

…

 

They met at the first volleyball practice of their first year at Karasuno. He had stood underneath the awning of the gym, holding his gym shoes in one hand, a club registration form in other. He had filled it out during lunch, talking to Kinoshita and Narita about how fun this season would be, how their skills would improve, how they would stick together for three more years, having the time of their lives. 

 

Kinoshita and Narita had noticed the soft amber glow before he did. It didn’t hurt, like Chikara had been warned his entire life. It didn’t feel like anything.

 

He turned around, saw a fellow first year with a shaved head and rolled up sleeves on his gym uniform and a glowing neck, and knew that volleyball in high school was the right choice, after all.

 

…

 

Tanaka - Ryuu, the first year had insisted on - is flirting with the manager again. 

 

Shimizu doesn’t care; she’s not oblivious, but she’s not giving Ryuu any attention, either. Chikara likes the second year. He doesn’t hate her - he couldn’t even if he tried. No, Chikara hates Tanaka Ryuunosuke for flirting with every girl he sees even after they turn him down, even when Chikara is only a few feet away. He hates Tanaka Ryuunosuke for ignoring his soulmate unless he needs something. Chikara hates that he doesn’t identify as a girl even after everything he’s gone through to be seen as a boy, because at the end of the day, Tanaka would rather hit on a girl that’s told him she’s gay more times that Chikara can count.

 

But mostly, Ennoshita Chikara just hates Tanaka Ryuunosuke, mind, body, and soul.

 

…

 

When Chikara quit the team halfway through first year, Ryuu called him a pussy. 

 

Chikara told him to go hit on some more girls like the fuckboy he is.

 

Chikara doesn’t regret anything he said.

 

…

 

When Takeda-sensei asked Chikara to tutor the other first years before finals, he doesn’t really think about who that entails before he agrees. And he continues to not think about it until he’s in front of the Tanaka’s house, and by then, it’s already too late.

 

“Hey, Chikara-kun!” Saeko hugs him as soon as she opens the door. Chikara has always preferred her out of the two Tanaka siblings. “Yuu and Ryuu are in Ryuu’s room.”

 

He follows her in and accepts a few bowls of snacks. She kisses his cheek before he can leave the kitchen. 

 

“You’re always welcome here, you know?” She smiles, but it’s sad. Saeko knows about Chikara and Ryuu, but Chikara doubts any of her understanding comes from her brother. “Even if it’s just to hang out with me and play video games or something.”

 

In Ryuu’s room, the two second years haven’t even gotten their books out yet, and instead, are pouring over a magazine.

 

_ Ryuu and Yuu. _

 

Sometimes, Chikara feels like his soulmate’s best friend is a better match for Tanaka Ryuunosuke than Chikara.

 

…

 

“It just pisses me off so much, you know?” Chikara told Kinoshita and Narita four months into their first year. He was laying on his back, staring up at Narita’s ceiling. It’s the weekend, and he’s not wearing his binder. In his opinion, the lack of constriction makes it easier to complain.

 

“Why does he have to be so straight?” Chikara adds before covering his face with a pillow and screaming.

 

“You guys could have a platonic bond,” Narita says. He’s painting his toenails Karasuno’s colors - alternating orange and black - in preparation for the practice match on Tuesday. 

 

“Or, you just might not communicate enough, I don’t know, ever,” Kinoshita says. He doesn’t look away from his phone. 

 

“We do!” he argues, but he knows Kinoshita is right. He went through sex ed and the two month unit on soulbonds - communication is key, second to none. That doesn't make it any easier, though.

 

…

 

After he quits the team, Chikara has a lot of free time to sit and think about his future. His parents want him to study and think about school; instead, he researches surgeons who are willing to perform gender reassignment surgery in Miyagi. When he finds a doctor, he calls and sets up a consultation before calling his parents. 

 

It’s harder, this way, for them to say no when he already did most of the leg work.

 

…

 

He calls Ryuu’s home phone the morning of his surgery. He knows Ryuu won’t answer, and he knows the team is going out for new year’s together. It’s failsafe, or at least as safe as it gets.

 

But he doesn’t expect Ryuu’s sister to answer, and when she does, he’s unsure of what to say.

 

“I - I’m Chikara,” he finally says. “Ryuu’s soulmate?”

 

“Oh, hey!” Chikara has always liked Saeko, with how bright and cheerful she is, even when she’s had to raise her brother alone, even when her edges look sharp and harsh. “What’s up? Ryuu’s out right now, but - “

 

“It’s fine. I heard that the team was going out.” He pauses, bites his lip. “I’m having surgery.”

 

“Oh? What’s wrong?” Chikara chokes up when she sounds genuinely curious, like she’s actually upset for him.

 

“It’s not medical - “ Why didn’t he say that from the beginning? “ - I just figured Ryuu might like to know since I’ll miss the first few days of school.”

 

“I hope you heal quickly, then! Ryuu talks about you a lot, you know.”

 

“Thank you. I just didn’t want him to be nervous.”

 

Not that he would be, but -  _ Ryuu talks about you a lot, you know. _

 

“Do you want him to come by once you’re discharged? I could make you some food.”

 

“You don’t have to - “

 

“Only if you’re okay with that, of course - “

 

“If Ryuu wants to, and you want to,” Chikara finally says. 

 

“I’ll make sure to ask him, then. I hope all goes well, Chikara-kun! I hope you can come by soon.”

 

“Thank you, and, I’ll try to,” he replies, even though he never will.

 

Or, at least not in the way Saeko hopes.

 

...

 

He rejoins the team, along with Kinoshita and Narita, after Coach Ukai retires permanently, halfway through January. The team isn’t the same - even Daichi no longer seems interested in practice.

 

Ryuu doesn’t talk to him for an entire month, but then again, Chikara doesn’t try to talk to him, either. 

 

…

 

Three days after surgery and two days after being discharged from the hospital, the Tanaka’s knock on his door. Saeko holds out a plate full of cookies, covered with saran wrap.

 

“They’re sugar cookies. Kinoshita-kun said they were your favorite.”

 

They’re okay. Kinoshita likes sugar more, but Chikara isn’t surprised that his friend lied in order to get a dozen free cookies.

 

“Ryuu made them,” Saeko smiles. “He’s actually quite the baker.”

 

“Nee-san.” Ryuu frowns, blushing slightly. 

 

“What?” Saeko laughs. “God, you’re such a teenager. I hope they taste good, Chikara-kun!”

 

…

 

“Are you going to play again this year?” Shimizu asks him on the first day of school. She’s a third year now, but not much has changed. The boys still fawn over her, and she still doesn’t care. 

 

He can see Ryuu and Noya watching from around the corner, but he’s not sure whether Ryuu is here for him or the manager. He doesn’t know, nor does he care.

 

He remembers last year, when Noya and Asahi fought over what the team means, when he saw Daichi on the phone with Ukai’s family, trying to figure out the coach’s condition with puffy eyes. In the end, there’s really only one thing he can say, whether it’s the correct answer or not.

 

“Yes, what time does practice start?”

 

…

 

Chikara sees him - his soulmate - in the hallway the next day. He’s talking to a girl, another first year. She’s in Chikara’s class, but he doesn’t know her name yet. Tanaka doesn’t notice him at first, so Chikara watches them, Tanaka’s hands brushing against her’s, her pretty laugh. It makes his stomach twist. 

 

Chikara walks past them and makes sure to brush against Tanaka, so the entire hallway can see them light up, so the entire hallway knows that Tanaka is his. 

 

He’s known Tanaka for two days - he shouldn’t be so fiercely territorial. 

 

…

 

“Why’d you quit?”

 

Chikara is sitting alone on the roof; Kinoshita and Narita’s classes haven’t been released yet. He hadn’t expected to see Ryuu, and he certainly hadn’t expected him to sit down beside Chikara and unwrap his bento.

 

He shrugs. “I wasn’t enjoying it, I guess. Then I got surgery, so it was a bit harder to just come back, you know?”

 

“Oh.”

 

“Why do you hit on so many girls, Ryuu?”

 

“Does it bother you?”

 

Chikara has to fight back a laugh, because - wasn’t it obvious?

 

“What do you think?

 

“I’m sorry.”

 

“That doesn’t change what’s already happened.”

 

Ryuu nods. They don’t speak for a few minutes, and instead focus on their lunches. Chikara wonders where Noya is now, and why Ryuu isn’t with him. Maybe Noya is the only rational one between all of them, and actually knows to stay inside for lunch during early April, when it looks like it might rain without the slightest bit of warning. 

 

“What did you have surgery for?”

 

Chikara’s been waiting for the question for four months, now. He wants to ask why Ryuu took so long to ask.

 

“Top surgery.”

 

“So you’re - ?”

 

“Why do you think I never changed around the rest of the team?”

 

“Oh. That makes sense, I guess.”

 

“Yeah. I guess it does.”

 

They stay together for the rest of lunch, stuck in companionable silence.

 

And at volleyball that afternoon, they stretch together, cast the whole room in gold, for the first time, and Chikara feels right at home.

 

… 

 

Chikara walks into the gym once his mark fades. He doesn’t talk to the bald kid until after, once the gym is clean and the clubroom vacated. 

 

“I’m Chikara. Ennoshita Chikara.”

 

“Tanaka Ryuunosuke.”

 

Their hands brush a few times as they pack up their things, filling the small room with amber light. Chikara is blushing, but he’s not embarrassed in the slightest. He could stand to grow used to this - this feeling of floating.

 

…

 

“I’m sorry, about the...“ Ryuu trails off.

 

They’re in the visiting locker room at Seijoh, which Chikara feels like isn’t the best place for this conversation.

 

“The flirting?” he offers anyway.

 

“Yeah,” Ryuu laughs, blushing hard. “That. I’ve always been like that. And I like girls so that made things...complicated? Since you’re not one, right?”

 

“I’m not.”

 

“I did some research, by the way, on lgbtq issues and I’m still a bit confused, but I’m trying. I still like girls, but I want to try with you. I want to figure this out. I’m not going to just give on my soulmate because they’re a boy.”

 

Chikara swallows hard. Crying in another school’s locker room has never been a goal of his, but he feels like he might, either way.

 

“I know I’ll mess up, I did already, and I’m sorry about that. But, I’m going to improve, Chikara, I promise.”

 

Chikara nods, blinks back tears. “That’s good.” He hates how his voice sounds, cracked and watery, as he rubs his eyes with the insides of his wrists.

 

“Can I give you a hug?” Ryuu asks, and Chikara doesn’t even know why he bothered as he hugs the wing spiker, squeezing as tightly as he can.

 

“So we’re good?”

 

“We’re good.”

 

They still have work to do, and there are still problems and probably always will be. But Chikara won’t give up on Ryuu, as long as Ryuu isn’t giving up on him.

  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> like always, I'll probably do a sequel?? it will have far less angst, since suga mentions them together in rare bird (or, together enough for bathroom hookups)
> 
> comments and kudos are always appreciated!! requests are welcome at mother-iwa-chan on tumblr


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